Everything is wrong with me
Tuesday, August 17, 2004
four morning notes
1) I had to wait four full minutes this morning for my elevator in my building. Four minutes is a long, long time, especially when you're tired as a mother fucker and depressed, since you tried beating off in the shower but had to stop half-way through, because it just wasn't working. Not the best way to start the day.

2) Blind people on the subway terrify me. Like most people, I share that "who's going to help them" awkwardness as they slowly try to enter and exit the train. And I feel terrible for feeling this way, but I can't help it. Second, I also feel like they going to just fucking walk right off the edge of the platform and fall onto the tracks, without realizing what they're doing. I mean, this could happen - they can't see shit!

If I ever become blind, I would just sit home all day and smoke pot, and be the most lazy person in the world. Sure, being blind sucks, but it's an excuse to do absolutely nothing for anyone but yourself for the rest of your life. And sure, that's pretty much what I'm doing now, but I bet it'd be a lot more acceptable if I couldn't see.

3) I can not stress this enough: I do NOT like to talk to people on the subway. It's not personal, it's just that that's my time to be alone and get myself ready for another disappointing day. This applies to everyone - my roommate Ben and I, since we work in the same place, often commute in the morning on the same train, without speaking to each other the entire time.

So if you see me, say hello, and move on. I still love you, but I'm just really, really weird in the morning.

4) [This is left-over from the weekend, but I noticed it on the subway this morning too] As I've noted before, I am a sucker for lip gloss. I am also a sucker for girls who can dance, especially when they're tan. Add another thing to the list: hoop earrings. I know, I know - they can be trashy, but you're forgetting - I love trashy. Maybe it's because I grew up in South Philly (zing! to all the South Philly girls reading) but I don't know; I think hoop earrings are very, very hot. Call me crazy, call me racist, but that's just how I feel.

[I should note that this is the only post I've ever put up that when spell-checked had zero mistakes. To give you an idea of how I'm doing, this is definitely going to be the highlight of my day, barring sexual intercourse with a hoop earring-wearing girl on the subway ride home.]

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