Everything is wrong with me
Friday, March 19, 2004
A good friend of mine from school recently slept with a married guy. This is fairly shocking in itself, but even more so because this girl is a saint - rarely hooks up, never does wild and crazy things - the perfect girl to bring home to mom - until this. Well, she could still be the perfect girl to bring home to mom, if your mom likes girls who bang married guys. My mom doesn't really.

And we have been giving it to her over this, because she's felt really guilty about it. Last night, we were out having a drink and breaking her stones pretty darn hard. My friends and I decided then that it would be wise for us to all go out and get wedding rings to wear to bars, because what we're doing now just ain't working. I mean, it can't hurt, right? I asked her (the mistress) about this last night, and said, "Now, I don't have a wedding ring, but I do have a class ring. If I put that on do you think I can get maybe a handjob?" She wasn't very amused.

I just hope that when I'm married, girls will still want to sleep with me.

Wait - take out the word "still" from that sentence. Sorry.

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