Everything is wrong with me
Friday, March 12, 2004
[hand motion] "You're fired"
[trying to explain this without actually doing it is never going to work]

I don't really watch "The Apprentice" too much, because really driven people scare me. And I don't mean that I'm intimidated, I just don't know why anyone would care so much about something like "success." What happened to these people in their childhood, you know? Many people view being this driven as a sign of "having a good head on your shoulders", whereas all I can think about is, "What the hell was their house like growing up, especially around report card time?" Good lord.

But, by far the best thing about the show is the hand motion that Trump does when he says, "You're fired." He actually didn't do this last night, which was a let down.

Nevertheless, my friends and I have been rocking the hand thing since the show started, in every possible way. It can be used in a variety of situations:

- asking for something ("Ben [hand thing], grab me a beer");
- making fun of someone ("You know what? [hand thing] You're fat."); or
- at work ("Mike, [hand motion] I'll take care of it.")

That's all I've got for now. Later on I'll be responding to some of the emails I've gotten from you. Some have been nice. Others, not so much.

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